This is a guest letter from @KathyGower who blogs outsideasylummusings
Dear Pelvic Floor,
We need to talk.
I’m sorry, I know how I have neglected and abused you. I cannot begin to imagine how you must feel. Somehow, I missed how important you were to me back then. I’m so sorry for my neglect and abuse of you…..how can we begin to make things better between us? We share so much and yet, somehow we are not working in tune…..I hope we can make some changes before it is too late!
I think I first need to apologise for my lack of care for you after giving birth to my children….they really did take up much of my time, and I am afraid your needs got pushed aside in respect of their needs. I was young, and warnings about your needs not being met would come back to haunt me when I was older, fell on death ears I’m afraid. You know how it is, when we’re young, 50 and beyond seems like it’s never gonna happen!
Secondly, I then let your needs go unmet when I had my hysterectomy 20 years ago. I do have excuses, but I am not sure you’ll want to hear them. All I can say is, I am sorry, it wasn’t done deliberately, I just got it very wrong for you.
Finally, I have never been a slim person, and I know you have a lot of my weight to cope with. I am very aware how much this makes your job difficult, and again, I apologise and know that sorry isn’t enough.
I also need to add here, that the secrecy, shame and humiliation of a break down in our communications have made it really hard to even consider looking at how we can make amends. So, today, right now, I am coming out and telling the world about our difficulties and hope that this lets you see how determined I am to make positive changes.
So, what now…..I can’t promise you I will lose weight, as I haven’t achieved much in the way of permanent weight loss in all the years I have been obese. So, I’m not going to make empty promises, as that could be as bad as the neglect you have already been subjected to. I suspect you have noticed that I have been getting touch with you lately. I have to say, after all these years of neglect, you’ve been pretty difficult to find. Sometimes I think I have found you, but it’s never clear that it is you I am communicating with!
You will have noticed I have bought you some weights…..interesting, n’est pas? Again, I’m not sure we’re managing them correctly, and it’s very, very difficult to know for sure. It’s not like we can go and ask someone if this is correct! So, I think for now, we’ll carry on and see if there is any improvement in our relationship.
So, there we are, my sincere apologies for the previous 34 years of neglect….I really, really hope we can find a positive way forward and begin to work in harmony in the future.
My fondest regards,