Tag Archives: Dentist

Dear Teeth


Dear Teeth,

I’m rather attached to you but clearly I don’t take as good a care of you as I should as yet again I need a filling or two. ūüė¶

My parents have the worstest ever teeth so I would like to blame my genetics combined with a terrible sweet tooth. Sugar in my tea/coffee and too many sweet things.  I do brush you with supermaximum strength prescription only fluoride toothpaste but I can be as guilty as the next person of not flossing very often or always using mouthwash on you. This needs to change and fast if I want to actually keep all my own teeth for the next 50 years or so that I will hopefully be living.

I don’t want to end up like my grandma with my teeth in a jar of water beside the bed firmly clamped around a murray mint.

No more excuses- the poor dental hygiene stops here.  Back to sweeteners in my tea, sugar free drinks, fewer sweets etc and a proper teeth cleaning routine including floss and mouthwash and a sparkling smile. #operationsavemyteethintooldage is a go! (and maybe the removal of the tongue piercing will also help).

Lots of love and teeth kisses (except that is a rude offensive gesture-oops).

LadyPreventingToothlessOldHagCurd

An actual mould of my teeth which for some reason I kept in a memory box!

Dear Tongue Piercing- Farewell


Dear Tongue Piercing- Farewell,

I can barely type this through the tears. Me and you have been attached for 12 years now- you have stuck with me through good times and bad, but now it is time for us to live apart, for you are affecting my gums and the dentist is worried.  I did exchange the metal you for plastic about 8 years ago to protect my teeth as much as possible but there comes a time were I cannot risk becoming a toothless old hag just because I like wearing you.

I suppose now I am 30, married with two kids, I should grow up and embrace the twinset and pearls (noooooooo!). You and my Tragus piercing are the last remnants of my mispent youth, where I used to have 20 piercings (yes in all those places that you probably shouldn’t).

Of all my piercings you were my favourite- even if you did cause my mum to shout “Victorian Masturbator” at the top of her voice whenever she caught me playing with you to try and get me to stop. (this was because the Victorian¬†Masturbator¬†was always depicted as a tongue lolling fool! Thanks for being so¬†embarrassing¬†mum).

You were my secret piercing (well apart from the other now defunct secret ones ;)), ¬† the one I could get away with in my dayjob working with young people, and the one that would sometimes give me a bit of an edge working with some of the more challenging young people- as with a tongue piercing I was “cool” (despite the distinct lack of coolness in my general attire and general persona!).

Also lets face it- you added a certain frisson when um using your mouth, for like snogging and eating icecream and other fun stuff like that (& am  not saying any more than that *blushing furiously*)

So yeah I am really really going to miss you, it is end of an era.

Tongue Lollingly yours

LadyCurd.

P.S I haven’t taken you out quite yet- might have to make a bit more of an event out of it if you see what I mean. ūüėČ

xxx