Tag Archives: labour

Dear First Time Pregnant Ladies

Dear First Time Pregnant Ladies,

I need you to know this statistic. I wish I had known it before I had Oddler.

Approx 50% of first births will end in intervention. 25% of those will be (emergency) C-Section, 25%of them forceps or ventouse.

That means 1/2 may not get the vaginal delivery they have been expecting, planning or hoping for. There are lots of things you can do to try and minimise your chances of intervention but ultimately what happens, happens and it is most important YOU DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF FOR ANY OF IT.

I spent too long blaming myself for Oddlers Birth and subsequent time on NICU with Oxygen Starvation, I wish I had realised sooner it wasn’t my fault, but a set of circumstances combined, which ultimately we have all healed from, and for that I count my blessings.

That’s not to say an assisted delivery will always be a traumatic experience. I know many women who have had very positive assisted deliveries. In my own case although forceps were used (and I had in my head that I would rather a C-section than forceps) ultimately they saved my daughter from being any more oxygen deprived and they had to be used- a C-section could have been so much worse. It wasn’t a pleasant experience but it wasn’t the worst part of the birth, so please don’t be too scared of assisted deliveries, they can save the life of you and your baby.

I wish you a lovely positive birth experience that you will cherish, and I wish you all the very best on your journey into motherhood. However if sadly you don’t have that experience (1 in 10 women will suffer birth trauma, and that could be regardless of whether you have a vaginal or an assisted delivery) I beg you not to blame yourself for it and to seek help if you are struggling with what happened. The Birth Trauma Association and Maternity Matters are excellent sources of support and information. I also kept this blog detailing my journey of healing so that I could go onto confidently have Omble, which was a healing wonderful experience that I would be happy to repeat- maybe a home waterbirth next time (though it was still quite ouchy! ;))

Lots of labouring love


P.S Always more than happy to talk to women about birth trauma if you wanted/needed. Email me or contact via twitter.

Dear Labour Playlist

Dear Labour Playlist,

I decided to listen to you again this morning.  I was totally organised anal, You had a nice relaxing section, then a more energtic section and even a pushing stage aerobic music kinda section!  Maybe I really overthought it but it was awesome to listen to you whilst giving birth to Omble.  But um today I realised there are some frankly bizarre and amusing songs to give birth too on there so I thought you needed to know my randomest and weirdest song choices out of the 250 songs I had on my list. 🙂

The Final Countdown (In the end it was a 3hour labour- so not a long countdown)

Salt N’Pepa: Push it Push It (I didn’t even feel to push- 5 minute pushing stage- my body took over- she kind of glided out thanks to a fanjo that had previously birthed a 2lb heavier baby!

Kings of Leon: Sex on Fire (it was! Ouch! Thank heavens for Gas and Air)

Queen of Japan: I was made for loving you (Slushy but I was made for loving her. I knew she was a she :D)

ATB: Til I come (erm seriously Orgasmic Birth I did NOT have! )

Bony M: Daddy Cool ( I remember giggling when this one came on and shouting at Lord Curd- this one was for him!)

The Ting Tings- Shut up and let me go (Bet Omble was thinking that- stop your screaming woman and get me out of here!)

As Playlists go you will always make me smile- so thankyou.

Love in Labour and Beyond