Tag Archives: Love

Dear Elderly Couple Buying Lightbulbs

Dear Elderly Couple buying lightbulbs,

It made me happysad when Mr Elderly Couple cheerily announced

“Oooh it says these new lightbulbs last 10years, just think, we will probably never have to buy lightbulbs again!”

Mrs Elderly Couple you looked a combination of faintly amused yet groaning inwardly at your husbands sense of humour, and yet also clearly slightly terrified of your future demise as you simply said “yes dear”.

I do hope you both get to experience the joys of purchasing energy saving lightbulbs again (although top tip -your electricity provider often gives them out for free) but more importantly I hope Mr Elderly Couple keeps up his sense of humour and you and Mrs Elderly Couple remain such a lovely clearly happy couple and that when your time does come that you get to shuffle off this mortal coil and towards the light (the light that takes several minutes to warm up and reach full brightness) together at the same time, so one of you never misses the other, bad mortality jokes and all.

Lots of Love

P.S You are role models for me &LordC. I want someone to write about doing something like that in 40years or so. 🙂

Dear Cupid

Dear Cupid,

As you know it’s our 4 year wedding anniversary today. We have been together 7.5years and I can honestly say I didn’t think it was possible to love him any more than I did four years ago today, but in the last few years since we got married, had two babies one with early health worries, lost two babies and a fallopian tube mine not his obviously 😉, temporarily misplaced my mind with PTSD etc, found it again, lost my darling dad, I realise how utterly wonderful incredible awesome and amazing my fantastic husband is.   I know I’m gushy and being soppy and annoying but it is true.

I love LordCurd with all my heart (apart from the bits also reserved for our gorgeous daughters obviously), our wedding day was the best day of my life and I hope we have so many more wedding anniversaries to look forward too together.

Anyhow, gushing aside dear Cupid- I have been scanning in old photos in a big clearout and I was looking through childhood photos of me and LordCurd.

I have a funny feeling you had us in mind for each other from the very start.

So thanks for that Cupid. I owe you one.



P.S LadyCurd on Left, LordCurd on right.


Same love of beige suits.


Same Brown beanbag next to a radiator


Same taste in yellow hats


Same penchant for disguise and detectives


Same standing at top of steps one looking like needs a wee the other looking like it’s too late.


Same ability to look odd in a pushchair


Same ability to wear dad out


Similar hand to mouth obsession with mum


Same penchant for dressing up although these days less gender stereotyped.


 So that was Lord and LadyCurd  and their little years- here’s hoping for many more big years ahead of us, til they grow old and grey…..

….and live and die happily ever after.

Dear Gotye

Dear Gotye,

Tonight I am completely and utterly infatuated with this song:

I am totally getting a massive teen girl crush on you which doesn’t befit my 30year old happily married mum with two kids status. Oh dear.

*smooches your poster before I go to sleep anyway*

Lots of love


Dear “I’m not 12 soundtrack”

Dear “I’m not 12 soundtrack”,

Last night while snuggled up with LordCurd in the spare room single bed* listening to music on shuffle, waiting for Omble to wake up for her next feed, Elliot Smith- the Biggest Lie came on.

Being squidged up in a single bed listening to that song, it took me back to a time seven years ago, having just started dating LordCurd, hanging out in his attic bedroom in Cambridge, hot summer afternoons, a blow up double bed with a lime green sheet (because his single bed sagged and creaked 😉 ). Walls full of revision post it notes stuck on them, rippling in the breeze. Sitting with him in my hot stuffy tiny Renault 5, drinking cups of tea on single yellows in the hot afternoons on my way back from work just because we wanted to see each other but the parking restrictions didn’t lift for another three hours and there was no-where to park.  The traffic warden smiling and saying “not you again” whenever she saw us, and I had to move on. The punting in the Cam, the giggling piggy back rides on Parker’s piece, the lying at night under a tree adorned twinkling white fairy lights at my May ball. Heck we actually were love’s young dream.

I was reminiscing all this with LordCurd, “Did you think back then, we’d ever end up here with two kids?”, “No”.  The music changed- it was jarring – the memories were fading and reality was coming back, I asked LordCurd to play some other songs from that time, did he not have a playlist!?  “No- I’m not twelve”.

Well sod it. I AM twelve, and here for your delight is my “I fell properly deeply irrevocably in love for the first time ever playlist” also known as the “I’m not twelve and I married a grumpy bugger soundtrack”

This soundtrack is making me smile and remember those magical times.

Seven year itch. What itch?


Loads of soppy slushy making the kids cringe love

LadyToHerLordCurdbut like totally not in a subordinate way- equal partnership and all that, I’m a feminist and whatnot

*P.S. LordCurd is in said single bed in spare room until Omble stops co-sleeping- read these letters and don’t hold your breath. Missing him.

Paris 2006   Tiny Pic as too cheesy to be any bigger.

Dear Amazing Mummy

Dear Amazing Mummy,


Have another sticker.

Love LordCurd (“GuestPost”*)

P.S From LadyCurd- originally this letter didn’t take the sticker chart quite in the spirit which it was intended. I added a P.S to the original but I decided in the end to rewrite it how I should have taken it, coz it’s my blog and I can rewrite history like that if I want too. Also since I earned another sticker 😉 I can now continue gathering evidence of being an amazing mummy if social services ever pop by. *preens*

*P.P.S This is a lie, LadyCurd wrote it.

Dear Heart

Dear Heart,

Felt I had to write to you, given I have written to many other body parts, it seems remiss of  me not to write to you given your importance in my life and keeping me alive and all that.  To be honest I’m a bit worried about you at the minute for various reasons. Your Dad’s heart condition that ultimately killed him is hereditary- looks like your brother’s heart has same condition and tomorrow you have to phone your dad’s consultant to arrange tests to see if you have the same, although you are lucky being a female heart is somewhat protective.

I know I need to look after you better dear heart, you get too much saturated fat (dam that chocolate addiction) and you don’t often get a good cardiovascular work out.   Thankfully you are pumping blood around a body that isn’t overweight (thanks to breastfeeding but when I stop this may change, if I’m still eating as ginger cake a day). But still I’m 30, my brother and dad had both had heart attacks by now. I have to watch it. I want to grow old and watch my girls grow up. I want to be a grandma one day.

A valentine’s heart for a scientist or doctor (Thanks @silv24 for sharing pic)

As romantic hearts go you’ve pretty much done me proud, I’d say you only truly got stamped on three times (saying “broken hearted” is daft- hearts are resilient they don’t break unless you are dead!) – twice in South Africa (same bloke- you were a fool to let him in again, but now he is your friend on Facebook and the weird “soulmate” intensity is no longer there!) and once by the gaslighting fuckwit who ended up having rather a lot written about him in the card which is now my avatar. He once gave me a bullet with his name on “to shoot him through the heart with if I ever cheated on him!”. Um.  He was also a friend on facebook until he was deleted him as he is not someone needed in your life.  I did offer him the bullet back as at the time he had told me it was his grandfathers and incredibly special to him so would have been mean to throw it away. He declined. I still haven’t thrown it way- plan on using it as a prop to warn my girls about the dangers of abusive relationships.


Said bullet in original case with original cotton wool. Hope said fuckwit never reads this!

Heart overall, you probably got quite bruised quite a few more times than the stampings mentioned above, but to be totally fair you have inadvertently done your own share of bruising other people’s, I know you aren’t proud of this, and have never set out to hurt anyone intentionally. I think you probably have the Sunscreen lyrics tattooed onto you somewhere:

“Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.”

Tis a good motto to live and love by.  Anyhow now you have the lovely LordCurd, who not only looks after your physical heart by providing it with nourishing healthy food (although he does also provide chocolate and wine on demand too! Yay but grr!) and um encourages exercise of a sort ;), but he also looks after your romantic heart, the footprints of the previous stampings having completely vanished since you met him.

Anyhow dear heart. I hope you will be okay for another 50years, I hope you don’t have the same genetic thingummy bob as your dear old dad and brother, I hope you will carry on being as full as love for LordCurd and Oddler and Omble as you are today. Keep on beating. For me.

Heartfelt Love


Dear Equal Marriage

Dear Equal Marriage,

I want you to know that you in no way threaten my marriage or family life (what an utterly ridiculous notion!), and all those fools who think otherwise are the sorts of idiots who shouldn’t be allowed to get married or procreate and then we might end up with a world full of tolerant and respectful people who know that marriage should be between two people who love each other regardless of gender.

In fact Chief Justice Margaret Goodridge summarised it much better than me

From “Goodridge Vs. Department of Health” by Massachusetts Supreme Court Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall
Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial, and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations….Without question, civil marriage enhances the “welfare of the community.” It is a “social institution of the highest importance.”

Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family…. Because it fulfils yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life’s momentous acts of self-definition.

We had that reading at our own wedding it was awesome (and nicely subversive for the more “traditional” homophobic relatives present as guests.)

Anyhow marriage equality is so important. Yes the UK has civil partnerships but they are bloody well marriages and should be called as such.

All’s left to say is “if you are against same sex marriage, don’t marry someone of the same sex” (Wonda Sykes). Sorted.

Lot’s of love


P.S Please please please fill in the government consultation on equal marriage. You can do so here . Don’t let the bigots win this one!

Dear Foreign Couple in Love on the Tube

Dear Foreign Couple in Love on the Tube,

I noticed you yesterday as I was off to my important work meeting wearing Omble in a wrap.  You were probably in your mid to late 30’s and completely wrapped up in each other, you kept whispering to each other, giggling and holding hands. It was really lovely to see.  Normally I am not a fan of public displays of affection (I am writing a letter to my prudish side which will publish at somepoint!) but this was different. It wasn’t smutty or snogging- you had a wonderful genuine warmth and passion for each other.

As you went to get off the tube the man noticed Omble, smiled and said something to his partner in whatever language it was. She laughed and said to me. “He said lets us have a another baby, we have three!”. I laughed and said “good luck with that!”, but afterwards I couldn’t stop smiling about it.  I’m guessing you were on a romantic break away from the kids for a few days and I loved how you were giving your adult relationship some valuable time and that you were still so clearly very very much in love even after 3 kids!  In fact I am smiling now as I write this.  I hope Lord Curd and I can be as happy as you are, however many kids we end up having.   I am definitely going to book us on a romantic weekend break away too now for when I finish breastfeeding Omble (maybe a year away at the minute!).

Thank you for reminding me how important it is to invest time and space into your marriage away from the day to day mayhem of being parents.  I hope you have a wonderful romantic holiday (and maybe even try for that 4th! ;))

Lots of happy love


Dear More

Dear More,

I’m so glad I taught you as a word to Oddler.

Not only does she now do a perfect Oddler Twist, holding her bowl out and plaintively asking for “more” which is simply adorable from my little toddler urchin with a fecking massive appetite, but we also now seem to be locked in a “more” arms race:

Me: Love you
Oddler: Love you
Me: Love you more*
Oddler: Love you more more
Me: Love you more more more
Oddler: Love you more more more more
Me: Love you more more more more more
Oddler (who can’t count but who is determined to win): Love you more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more.
Me: sweeps her up for a giant kiss and cuddle and whispers many more “love you more”‘s under my breath. What can I say, I’m a competitive mother! 😉

But yeah dear More as a word you are a favourite at Curd Hall but can we now please hurry up teach the concept of “more sleep” to Omble?

Many more thanks

P.S *the arms race arose out of reading “Guess how much I love you”- those rabbits suffering from a similar competitive love problem.

Dear Boy on the Pavement

Dear Boy on the Pavement,

I think of you sometimes dear boy on the pavement. I was 15ish getting a coach somewhere, we had just left a scheduled stop at a coach station, I don’t remember which one. There you were on the pavement. Our eyes met and I felt a connection, my heart beat a little faster, my breathing quickened. We couldn’t stop staring at each other, you and I. Your friends were teasing you but you were ignoring them, you only had eyes for me.

The coach was moving very slowly in the heavy traffic and you walked alongside it accompanying me on my journey, I wanted to write my number on a piece of paper and throw it to you, but the coach had no windows and I had no paper.

The traffic lights changed, the coach picked up speed, taking me away from you forever. You broke into a bit of a run, you smiled and waved goodbye and as the coach turned a corner you were gone.

Do you remember that moment dear boy on the pavement? I have never forgotten it, and probably never will.

Love LadyGirlOnTheCoachCurd